maurice cohn's (vipermoe) Blog

A female CNN journalist heard about a very old Jewish man who had been going to the Wailing / Western Wall to pray, twice a day, every day, for a long, long time. So she went to check it out. She went to the Western Wall and there he was, walking slowly up to the holy site. She watched him pray a...

Last week, I checked into the Four Seasons in Palm Beach and was a bit lonely. I thought, "I'll call one of those women you see advertised in phone books for escorts and other things."I looked through the phone book, found a full page ad for a gal calling herself Samantha Foxx - a very cute gal w...

Two priests decided to go to Hawaii on vacation.  They were determined to make this a real vacation by not wearing anything that would identify them as clergy.  As soon as the plane landed they headed for a store and bought some really outrageous shorts, shirts, sandals, sunglasses, etc. The next...

Job Descriptions:    1. A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain. 2. An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today. 3. A statistician is someone who is good w...

At the site, one lone survivor sat with his back against a tree, chewing on a bone. As he tossed the bone onto a huge pile of bones, he noticed the rescue team. "Thank God", he cried out in relief. "I am saved!"The rescue team did not move, as they were in shock, seeing the pile of human bones be...

Two old Jewish men, Sid and Al, are sitting in a Mexican restaurant in Los Angeles, one day. Sid asks Al, "Do you know of any people of our faith born and raised in Mexico?"  Al replies, "I don't know, let's ask our waiter."   When the waiter arrives, Al asks, "Are there any Mexican Jews?"  The w...

A loan agent and a priest both died and went to Heaven at the same time. They get to the pearly gates where Pope St. Peter greets them. He motions to the priest, and they both hop in a jeep and go out the back door. There are about 50 acres of rolling hills with a little cottage on the knoll. St....

Two nuns are ordered to paint a room in the convent, with a warning from the Mother Superior not to get even a drop of paint on their habits. After conferring about this, the two nuns decide to lock the door of the room, strip off their habits, and paint naked... In the middle of the project, the...

A woman was having a passionate affair with an inspector from a pest-control company. One afternoon they were carrying on in the bedroom together when her husband arrived home unexpectedly.'Quick,' said the woman to the lover, 'into the closet!' She pushed him in the closet, stark naked.The husba...

A man passed out on the beach in Miami for four hours, and got a horrible sunburn, specifically to the front of his legs above his knees.He went to the hospital, and was promptly admitted after being diagnosed with second-degree burns With his skin already starting to blister, and the severe pain...