maurice cohn's (vipermoe) Blog

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Mortgage and Lending - iMortgage

ARCHIVED BLOG POSTS

2010 

4 Comments
The following were purportedly taken off of actual police car videos around the USA..."Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document.""So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?""Yes, Sir, ...
07/30/2010
3 Comments
A doctor of psychology was doing his normal morning rounds when he entered a patient's room. He found Patient #1 sitting on the floor, pretending to saw a piece of wood in half. Patient #2 was hanging from the ceiling, by his feet. The doctor asked patient number 1 what he was doing. The patient ...
07/29/2010
6 Comments
A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked about having a son. They decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted. The wife got pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy. The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son. He was horrified at the ugli...
07/28/2010
4 Comments
Adam was hanging around the Garden of Eden feeling very lonely.So, God asked him, "What's wrong with you?"Adam replied that he didn't have anyone to talk to.God said that He was going to make Adam a companion and that it would be a woman.He said, "This pretty lady will gather food for you, she wi...
07/27/2010
3 Comments
Little Mary Margaret was not the best student in her Catholic School. Usually she slept through the class. One day her teacher, a Nun, called on her while she was sleeping. . "Tell me Mary Margaret, who created the universe?" . When Mary Margaret didn't stir, little Johnny who was her friend sitt...
07/26/2010
4 Comments
Why Men Can't Win If you work too hard, there is never any time for her. If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum. If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, it's exploitation. If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your ass and find something be...
07/23/2010
5 Comments
If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you have tocall them and ask if they mean you or them .                                                                                                                                        The economy is so bad that I got a pre-decline...
07/22/2010
1 Comments
A young woman was having a physical examination and was very embarrassed because of a weight problem. As she removed her last bit of clothing, she blushed. "I am so ashamed, Doctor," she said. "I guess I let myself go." The physician was checking her eyes and ears. "Don't feel ashamed, Miss. You ...
07/22/2010
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, and our bleak future, that I called the Suicide Lifeline and was connected to a call center in Pakistan. When I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could...
07/21/2010
3 Comments
A trucker came into a truck stop cafe and placed his order. He said, I want three flat tires, a pair of headlights and pair of running boards. The brand new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, This guy out there just ordered three flat tires, a...
07/21/2010
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