maurice cohn's (vipermoe) Blog

A man in a bar sees a friend at a table, drinking by himself. Approaching the friend he comments, "You look terrible. What's the problem?" "My mother died in August," he said, "and left me $25,000." "Gee, that's tough," he replied. "Then in September," the friend continued, "My father died, leavi...

In a local sports bar trivia quiz the other night, I lost by one point. The question was, where do women mostly have curly hair?  Apparently, it's AfricaOne of the other questions was to name two things commonly found in cells. It appears that Mexicans and African Americans is not the correct ans...

Weve all at one time or another given our best try at tongue twisters, have a look through this funny list and see how you do...Randy wondered why Willie really wasn't well.Sam saw six shiny silver spoons.Giddy gophers greedily gobble gooey goodies.Slippery slimy snakes slide slowly.Six shiny sna...

RED SKELTON'S Recipe for the Perfect Marriage:1. Two times a week we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.2. We also sleep in separate beds.Hers is in California , and mine is in Texas ..3. I take my wife everywhere, b...

An elderly couple were killed in an accident and found themselves being given a tour of heaven by Saint Peter. "Here is your oceanside condo, over there are the tennis courts, swimming pool, and two golf courses. If you need any refreshments, just stop by any of the many bars located throughout t...

The mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was having sex. Worried the girl might become pregnant and damage the status of the family, she consulted the family doctor.The doctor told her that teenagers today were very willful and any attempt to stop the girl would probably r...

A man charges into a bank wearing a balaclava and wielding a handgun.He shouts "This is a raid - everyone get on the floor!", and proceeds to empty the cash drawers.As he runs towards the door with the loot, a brave customer yanks off his balaclava. The robber immediately shoots the customer in t...

Two Irish nuns have just arrived in USA by boat and one says to the other, "I hear that the people of this country actually eat dogs.""Odd," her companion replies, "but if we shall live in America, we might as well do as the Americans do."As they sit, they hear a push cart vendor yell "Get your d...

One of my friends works in the customer service call center of a national pager company. He deals with the usual complaints regarding poor pager operation, as well as the occasional crank caller demanding to be paged less often, more often, or by more interesting people. The best call came from a...

The Banker saw his old friend Tom, an eighty year old rancher, in town. Tom had lost his wife a year or so before and rumour had it that he was marrying a 'Mail Order Bride.' Being a good friend, the banker asked Tom if the rumour was true. Tom assured him that it was. The banker then asked Tom '...