SATURDAY Bob, a 70-year-old, extremely wealthy widower, shows up at the Country Club with a breathtakingly beautiful and very sexy 25-year-old blonde-haired woman who knocks everyone's socks off with her youthful sex appeal and charm and who hangs over Bob's arm and listens intently to his every word. His buddies at the club are all aghast. At the very first chance, they corner him and ask, 'Bob, how'd you get the trophy girlfriend?' Bob replies, 'Girlfriend? She's my wife!' Theyare knocked over, but continue to ask. 'So, how'd you persuade her to marry you?' 'I lied about my age', Bob replies. 'What, did you tell her you were only 50?' Bob smiles and says, 'No, I told her I was 90.' 08/05/2011

  I was watching the television today and saw this image.  As you can tell she was sound asleep.  For whatever reason when we try to take pictures of her she is afraid of the camera so she looks away and it’s difficult to get one.    After I took the first picture it awoke her.  She looked at me and did not move so I took another one.  Have a good day.   07/30/2011

  ORIGIN OF THE WORD "AVIATOR" This explains it all. Aviators come from a long line of a secret society, formed around one thousand years ago. They are warriors, and here is the proof! Ground pounders can read it and weep! A little known fact is the origin of the word, "Aviator." In the immortal words of Johnny Carson: "I did not know that." Phu Khen (pronounced Foo Ken) 1169-? is considered by some to be the most under-recognized military officer in history. Many have never heard of his contributions to modern military warfare. The mission of this secret society is to bring honor to the name of Phu Khen. A 'Khen' was a subordinate to a 'Khan' (pronounced 'konn') in the military structure of the Mongol hordes. Khan is Turkish for leader.  Most know of the great Genghis Khan, but little ... 07/25/2011

  Gabriel went to the Lord and said, "I have to talk to you. We have some Texans up here who are causing some real problems.. They're swinging on the Pearly Gates, my horn is missing, and they are wearing T-shirts instead of their robes; there's barbecue and picante sauce all over everything, especially their T-shirts; their dogs are riding in the chariots and chasing the sheep. They are wearing baseball caps and cowboy hats instead of their halos. They refuse to keep the stairway to Heaven clean, and their boots are marking and scuffing up the halls of Wisdom. There are watermelon seeds and tortilla chip crumbs all over the place. Some of them are walking around with just one wing; and they insist on bringing their darn horses with them." The Lord said, "Texans are Texans, Gabriel. Hea... 07/17/2011

Here is a bit of  history buff in all of us. Here are some interesting tidbits that just maybe you didn't know. ******* In George Washington's days, there were no cameras. One's image was either sculpted or painted.  Some paintings of George Washington showed him standing behind a desk with one arm behind his back while others showed both legs and both arms.  Prices charged by painters were not based on how many people were to be painted, but by how many limbs were to be painted. Arms and legs are 'limbs,' therefore painting them would cost the buyer more.. Hence the expression, 'Okay, but it'll cost you an arm and a leg.'   (Artists know hands and arms are more difficult to paint) ******* As incredible as it sounds, men and women took baths only twice a year (May and October) Women kep... 07/09/2011

  FIRST TIME SEX   A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night to meet, and have a dinner with her parents.    Since this is such a big event, the girl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and make love for the first time.      The boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some protection. He tells the pharmacist it's his first time and the pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about protection and sex.   At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack.   The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.    That night, t... 07/05/2011

THE BUZZARD: If you put a buzzard in a pen that is 6 feet by 8 feet and is entirely open at the top, the bird, in spite of its ability to fly, will be an absolute prisoner. The reason is That a buzzard always begins a flight from the ground with a Run of 10 to 12 feet. Without space to run, as is its habit, It will not even attempt to fly, but will remain a prisoner for life in a small jail with no top. 06/25/2011

  Riddle of the Day  Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one. Michael J. Fox has a small one.  Madonna doesn't have one.  The Pope has one but doesn't use it.  Clinton uses his all the time.  Obama is one.  Mickey Mouse has an unusual one.  Liberace never used his on women..  Jerry Seinfeld is very, very proud of his.  Cher claims that she took on 3.  We never saw Lucy use Desi's.  What is it?  Answer below!  (This is pretty good)                                                          ***********************************************************                                                         The answer is: 'A Last Name.'     You didn't think I'd send you a dirty joke, did you?                Get your mind out of the gutter!!!!!!!!! 06/24/2011

  Hold onto your seats as I usually don’t do this but I couldn’t pass this one up.  It’s a completely nude party in a pool.  Be sure and shut the door or even better lock it before clicking on the link.  I give you fair warning again it is a completely nude pool party.  I would like your feedback and I hope AR does not block me for posting this. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dNs7NLTbEKg 06/21/2011

  Here is another word in the continuing saga of the National Spelling Bee.  I can’t even pronounce it much less spell it.  Anyway it’s not in Webster’s© so I had to go online.  It’s a German name for intermezzo so today I’ll give you the meaning of (in’ termet’so) which means: a short, light dramatic, musical, or ballet entertainment between the acts of a play or opera.  Where do they come up with these words? 06/15/2011

  A WOMAN WILL...            A real woman is a man's best friend.         She will never stand him up and never let him down.         She will reassure him when he feels insecure and comfort him after a bad day.         She will inspire him to do things he never thought he could do;  to live without fear and forget regret.       She will enable him to express his deepest emotions,  and give in to his most intimate desires.        She will make sure he always feels as though he's the most handsome man in the room and will enable him to be the most confident, sexy, seductive and invincible...           No wait...Sorry...                    I'm thinking of whiskey. It's whiskey that does all that.           Never mind.   06/07/2011

  My wife is one of the smartest people I know and if I can’t spell a word I call her and she 99.99% of the time can spell it with no problem and tell you what its meaning is.  So as I was looking over Webster’s© and came across this word I went to her and she got pretty darn close so I decided to use it.  Again I ask you do you show clients homes that are (ke mo’de es)?  I know I do and the meaning is: offering plenty of room; spacious; roomy.  If the home is smaller in size as long as the rooms look big and it makes the client happy we’ve done our job.  Enjoy the day 05/30/2011

  For several years, a man was having an affair with an Italian woman. One night, she confided in him that she was pregnant.  Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he said he would pay her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child.  If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18.   She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born.. To keep it discreet, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write 'Spaghetti' on the back. He would then arrange for the child support payments to begin.   One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife. 'Honey, she said, 'you received a very strange post card today.'  'Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it later... 05/19/2011

  Seems as the story goes a father had taken his little girl to a museum.  As they were walking around they came upon a replica of one of the ships that brought the Pilgrims over across the ocean.  She also saw the meager belongings the Pilgrims took with them.  After looking at the articles and ship the girl said to her father “They must have believed in something.”  Keeping that in mind we all start with meager beginnings and look what the Pilgrims accomplished.  You may ask what has this to do with real estate.  We all begin with meager beginnings be it in the knowledge or materials to work with.  Some of us will become real estate giants and some won’t which one will you be will you survive and prosper or give up and go away?  Only time will tell 05/18/2011

  As the story goes a young boy wanted to get his parents something special for a gift.  As he approached them he was filled with excitement.  He said: “When I grow up I’m going to buy you an electric can opener, an electric toaster an electric stove and an electric chair”.  While the meaning of the last gift is not known or what the outcome was imagine you making the same mistake on words you use when talking to a client.  Chose your words carefully before speaking, once they have been spoken nothing can take the words back or the harm they cause. 05/12/2011

  The other day my wife and I stayed home and did some yard work.  Raking some leaves, burning (called the fire department).  Mowed, used the weed eater. Needless to say we were busy.   She asked me to go and get a truck load of mulch.  Getting away from the back breaking work was a relief and gladly I took the wallet and left.  I drove up and drove up to the place and after getting the mulch the guy and I started talking.  Seems he’s interested in selling the business, land, building and everything as the old saying goes lock stock and barrel.  As I reached into my pocket to get my business card I realized it wasn’t there.  In my rush to leave I left my cards on the kitchen table.  Needless to say I went home got them and left one on the man’s vehicle.  I have preached to newbie’s the ... 05/12/2011

Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?  A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.  Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?  A.. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.  Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?  A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?  Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?  A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark..  Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?  A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.  Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?  A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected.  Q. Back in the old days, when ... 05/04/2011

  While I don’t really know why people like going to these I guess it’s a cultural type thing.  This moron tries something that could have cost him his life.  To each their own but for me you’re just asking for problems.  You should be able to open this by clicking on the link below.  It’s not very long but that is one lucky guy…   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GBDQacEQ0EQ   04/28/2011

  I’ve written on this before not so long ago.  What’s amazing to me is it just happened to me and being the fun loving guy I am I have decided I should past this on to all or my AR friends. Please feel free to pass this along to your friends.  Don’t you just love the fellowship we share on Easter Day?  I sure do so click on the link and enjoy. http://www.terrisfp1.com/holidays/chick.html 04/24/2011

  OK don’t going getting bent out of shape it’s not what you think.  I know I’ve had it done to me on more than one occasion.  I in fact have done this to other people and still do so to this day.  As for myself I’ll do this until the day I die and might even leave a reminder after death just as a “got ya last”.  The meaning of (jap’) a joke or jest, to play tricks on.  I love it and not only can I dish it out I can take it to.  What about you? 04/18/2011