maurice cohn's (vipermoe) Blog

Mrs. Fisher comes to visit her son Jacob for dinner.  He lives with a female roommate, Rachel.During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how pretty Jacob's roommate was.  She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and this had only made her more curiou...

A small zoo in Arkansas obtained a very rare species of gorilla.  Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle.  Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in heat. To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available.  Thinking a...

Since Seniors are texting and tweeting, there appears to be a need for a STC (Senior Texting Code). ATD: At The Doctor'sBFF: Best Friend FartedBTW: Bring The WheelchairBYOT: Bring Your Own TeethCBM: Covered By MedicareCUATSC: See You At The Senior CenterDWI: Driving While IncontinentFWB: Friend W...

A Sunday School teacher of pre-schoolers was concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus Christ because of the Christmas season emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred a long time ago, that He grew up, etc. So he asked ...

A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes and said "I would like to purchase some cyanide". The pharmacist asked "Why in the world do you need cyanide"? The lady replied "I need to poison my husband". The pharmacist's eyes...

A store that sells new husbands has opened in Manchester, just off Deansgate where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase ...

A Russian couple were walking down the street in Moscow one night, when the man felt a drop hit his nose. "I think it's raining", he said to his wife. "No, that felt more like snow to me", she replied. "No, I'm sure it was just rain" he said. Well, as these things go, they were about to have a ma...

A GOOD PUN IS ITS OWN REWORD * Energizer Bunny arrested - charged with battery. * A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative. * Practice safe eating - always use condiments. * Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death. * I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded. * If electricity comes...

A blonde goes to the post office to buy stamps for her Christmas cards.She says to the clerk, "May I have 50 Christmas stamps?" The clerk says, "What denomination?" The blonde says, "God help us. Has it come to this? Give me 6 Catholic, 12 Presbyterian, 10 Lutheran and 22 Baptists."

Christmas Carols for the Psychologically Challenged Christmas Carols for the Psychologically Challenged 1. Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear? 2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Queens Disoriented Are 3. Amnesia --- I Don't Know if I'll be Home for Christmas 4. Narcissistic --- ...